Memory Three
Feb. 19th, 2011 03:18 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
eyebemissingyouMemory Three: Realizing that he's in love with Seishirou.
What happened: After Seishirou is hurt defending Subaru and they reconcile, Subaru runs into a blind man with a seeing eye dog on the street. He rescues the man from some people intent on petting his dog and the two sit and talk for a while. Subaru expresses that he'd like to get a dog for Seishirou. The man passes Subaru a card for getting one, but also insists Subaru could help Seishirou out himself just by being there. He also says that he could tell Subaru "really loves this person" just by the tone of his voice. Subaru is shocked, but as he walks back to Seishirou's hospital room he thinks through what he feels and why he was so upset that Seishirou was hurt...and realizes that it's true, he's in love with the man. Memory ends there.
What he learned:
-The extent to how upset he was when Seishirou was hurt. The feeling is more powerful this time. He remembers exactly how he flipped out, and he remembers that even nee-san couldn't stop him.
-Why he was upset: because he was afraid Seishirou would hate him, and couldn't stand the thought of never seeing him again.
-He could see fine then? So something must have happened between this memory and the present moment that injured his own eye.
-...but the fact that he is in love with Seishirou pretty much outweighs everything else right now.
Impacts:
It's very good this memory came after the one of apologizing to Seishirou, because at least he has some context to place all this stuff in. It's very powerful for him emotionally, because as his sister put it best, Subaru loves everyone and when he finally does pay attention to himself and pick someone more special to him than anyone else, that person could make or break him. Remembering feeling that for a person he is just starting to know? Is unsettling...and perhaps a little embarrassing. Also is having trouble handling his memories of his breakdown over Seishirou being hurt, since that's some powerful emotional stuff too. Basically...is just a little flipped out right now. Plus, he's back to doing the "who is this person" dance again. Is he really what he seems? Why is Subaru so attached to him?
What happened: After Seishirou is hurt defending Subaru and they reconcile, Subaru runs into a blind man with a seeing eye dog on the street. He rescues the man from some people intent on petting his dog and the two sit and talk for a while. Subaru expresses that he'd like to get a dog for Seishirou. The man passes Subaru a card for getting one, but also insists Subaru could help Seishirou out himself just by being there. He also says that he could tell Subaru "really loves this person" just by the tone of his voice. Subaru is shocked, but as he walks back to Seishirou's hospital room he thinks through what he feels and why he was so upset that Seishirou was hurt...and realizes that it's true, he's in love with the man. Memory ends there.
What he learned:
-The extent to how upset he was when Seishirou was hurt. The feeling is more powerful this time. He remembers exactly how he flipped out, and he remembers that even nee-san couldn't stop him.
-Why he was upset: because he was afraid Seishirou would hate him, and couldn't stand the thought of never seeing him again.
-He could see fine then? So something must have happened between this memory and the present moment that injured his own eye.
-...but the fact that he is in love with Seishirou pretty much outweighs everything else right now.
Impacts:
It's very good this memory came after the one of apologizing to Seishirou, because at least he has some context to place all this stuff in. It's very powerful for him emotionally, because as his sister put it best, Subaru loves everyone and when he finally does pay attention to himself and pick someone more special to him than anyone else, that person could make or break him. Remembering feeling that for a person he is just starting to know? Is unsettling...and perhaps a little embarrassing. Also is having trouble handling his memories of his breakdown over Seishirou being hurt, since that's some powerful emotional stuff too. Basically...is just a little flipped out right now. Plus, he's back to doing the "who is this person" dance again. Is he really what he seems? Why is Subaru so attached to him?